I saw a little poster this morning on my Facebook newsfeed that made me realise this is the reason why I can honestly say I feel truly happy these days:
I realised I really genuinely have no regrets. I have made many many mistakes, yet I have learned from them, and the ones I may do now, I am learning from them even quicker and I seem to be making less and less as I am choosing the path of honesty and openness.
There are of course events in my life that make me feel sad but I realise this is part of life. You loose beings that are dear to you, however, you also gain some.
Here is an example:
Part of my recent Psychosis was due to my inability to deal with the loss of my dog, where I felt responsible for his death.
He had gotten into the bin and ate a big piece of cheese that got him so ill, the vets said after 2 days of caring for him it was best for me to put him to sleep. Hardest thing I have ever had to do and it affected me more than I realised – I was on anti-depressant at the time and so my true feelings only surfaced when I came off them.
What if I had double checked the kitchen door was closed properly before leaving for work, what if I had left him in Canada instead of wanting him by my side, what if….
Today, I realise his death enabled me to give a home to his best mate Sam:
Sam and his owner found themselves “homeless” recently after his owner split up from his partner and they had been crashing at various people’s places for two weeks.
When I reconnected with his owner after disconnecting from the one person who had prevented me from staying in touch, now an ex friend, I was able to give them a proper roof over their heads and a chance for them to try and relax whilst deciding where to go next.
If Frodo had been here, I may not have been able to do this. If I hadn’t met my husband, I would have never had Frodo. I can go a long way back in the connection process to realise that this particular happiness I feel right now wouldn’t have happened if things had been slightly different. I call it Sliding Doors, each decision you make in your life takes you to the present moment and right now, I feel so good that I am able to give the love and affection I have for dogs to Frodo’s mate, I cannot begin to tell you.
This is how you can be truly happy, have no regrets.